Meghan on Family-Free Holidays
Hear Meghan on Ruby Warrington's Women Without Kids Podcast
Since some of you have pointed out that I can be a little cagey when it comes to talking or writing about my life (quite a departure from past behaviors) I thought I would share this recent interview with the wonderful Ruby Warrington. Ruby has many areas of knowledge but has lately become a prominent voice on the subject of childlessness-by-choice. (Keep an eye out for her forthcoming book.) She had me on her podcast Women Without Kids to talk about my Thanksgiving essay about the joys of family-free holidays as well as my thoughts about solitude, growing old alone, volunteering in the foster care system, and much more. I also talk about how my parents weren’t really fans of children and therefore I disliked being a child. Fortunately, it’s a temporary condition!
You can listen to the interview here, here, here or wherever you get your podcasts. And you can find Ruby here.
More stuff about not writing about myself:
I’m Too Old To Write About My Life, Medium, March 19, 2021
I Didn’t Say You Shouldn’t Write About Yourself As You Get Older, Medium, March 25, 2021
This was a great conversation.
I've always believed that most people are not equipped to have children, including myself. I chose to have two kids. The first was planned but mostly pure biological drive, and the second was for the first to have an ally. Regret is not a word I would use in my decision to have kids. I wouldn't take it back, but I've always recognized that I could be equally content (or miserable) with or without kids. The only do-over I would want is to start at babyhood and be better the second time around.
I think of the Central Sadness as the human way, and family life is more of the same. My biggest wish is that I wouldn't fuck them up and I'm not sure that's the best mission or goal. Fraught is definitely the word.
Meghan -- I'm so glad to have discovered your writing and your voice this year, with some regrets that I'd not discovered you earlier. The initial pointer came via the "Smoke 'Em If You Got 'Em" podcast, which referenced an interview you had done with Sarah Hepola. From there I've visited "The Unspeakable", that "special place in hell", and read some of your earlier writings, in particular on childlessness and your real estate obsession. I've also been working through your earlier podcasts, including the one from 2011 that you just tweeted about. Being happily childless myself and also a bit confused about real estate, your recent essays about those and family holiday gatherings have spoken to me at a deep level. You've made me smile and think multiple times this past year and I look forward to supporting your work in 2023. Happy New Year!